An Open Letter To Katherine Heigl

Dear Ms. Heigl,

Listen, bitch.

I get it. You want out of your contract. And I can't say that I blame you for your past comments about the material you were given. Between the beautiful Denny arc of season 2 (back when we here at IoE were tolerant of JDM's continued presence on Grey's) and this current season, Izzie's plot-lines left a lot to be desired. I don't blame you for getting a little bored.

And then your film career began to take off! Knocked Up and 27 Dresses both did well at the box office. Of course, two hits do not a movie-star make, and you do lose points for starring in the lowest-grossing film of all time. But still! Your future looked bright, man, and you probably felt artistically stifled by Grey's Anatomy. And I'm here to tell you that it's okay to feel that way.

But listen. If they really do kill off Izzie Stevens to accommodate your lofty filmic aspirations, I will cut a bitch. I cannot idly stand by and watch Alex Karev's heart break like that (again! Remember Ava?). Over the past five seasons we have watched him go from a smart-ass kid to a good man, all the while he's been Shonda Rhimes' favorite punching bag. And I can't handle watching Alex mourn his dead wife, mmkay? You out of all of us know how heartwrenching Grey's can get when dealing with the death of a main character's loved one-- we all remember watching Izzie deal with Denny's demise. Don't do that to poor Alex.

Or do. Whatevs. But if I see you on the street, I might have to go all hood on your ass.

Seriously.

Sincerely,

Isle of Everything